A moment in time

Following on from my last post, which was written in a stream of conciousness as I sat surfing the web on this evening in April 2009, I found myself restless in bed and got up to write poetry.  Don’t judge me on that statement, it is just sometimes I find the words, my mind, and paper coincide, and most of the time they do not.

As I wrote on a random page of an old notebook I didn’t think about what I was writing, I just let my words hit the page in a most cathartic manner.  Then as I went to retire and try again to find sleep I discovered I’d written in this journal before, many years ago when I’d first came to the United States.  I repeat these words from August 11th 2003 here in ful:

The transition to life in the U.S. seems like a parachute jump.

Initially everything was a blur of detail, forms and faces, in racing freefall towards the ground, a solid visible end.  Even into early August I was still in freefall.  Now the days are still rushing by, but I feel I’m in the nano-seconds after pulling the ripcord.  I feel that in the next instant, the next three seconds I’ll discover if my ‘chute will open and I’ll float down safely to earth, or if I’ll be scrabbling for my reserve as the plummit continues…

My notes reveal I was listening to Peter Gabriel’s More Than This as I wrote those words, this song and another from the album “UP” managed to keep me in touch with reality as I went through a fairly difficult transition.  I’ll blog later on my interpretation of this song, but for now I’ll decide it is to suffice to say that there is far more than religious imagery within the lyrics.

Even now many years on I know those nano-seconds seemed so long, and that although that particular ‘chute opened, life itself is a continuation of this exciting and dramatic adventure.  I also realise I was struggling with fairly deep depression at that time, and those demons are now contained and I’m much happier now.  Still hooked on BASE jumping clips on YouTube too!

with every day another bit falls away…


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